When You're Not Looking

As I flew into Raliegh Thursday night, I longed for a notebook or anything to write on. So I mentally wrote about it on the scrap of a receipt that I was sure I would find in my bookbag if I actually felt like searching. But you know how it is, the minute you have a piece of paper, you want a bigger one for all the words you want to write, for all the things you see. So, I made myself remember and saved the words for here.

Out of all the times I've flown, I've never landed at night, or maybe I have, but it has never caused so much amazement. Above Raliegh, the lights from the interstates, the airport, and the neighborhoods were incredible. At first, I whimsically decided that night sky was below me, but instead of the usual cold, clear night, the stars were dressed up for the occasion of my landing in warm golden shrouds.

The night sky below me transformed itself into golden galaxies swirling and gestculating out in space. Then, it was a masterfully woven spiderweb, luring its prey forward into its depths with its golden silk. No, I was wrong. The lights were rivers and creeks, trickling golden across the dark land below me. And as we descended closer, I couldn't believe that I had mistaken these lights for anything else than the moon hitting the tops of the waves of an unknown ocean and the clusterry line of lights ahead obviously the spray at the tide hit the shore.

Flying always amazes me, usually leaving me in a world of snow-white clouds and thinking that they look so solid, just a big bed of cotton. Magical, really...although I'm beginning to wonder if I am using magical too much as a classification of wonderfulness. I'd hate for magical not to be magical any more.

Usually, words and thoughts and images come so easily. The easiest but somehow the hardest words come when I honestly feel them.

So here's how I feel:

ecstatic
nervous
daunted
happy
beautiful
tired
magical
wonderful
...
...
...
But mostly, after this weekend, I primarily and foremostly feel engaged.

Insert goofy grin paired with a happy dance and blatant showing-off of the ring here.

posted by molly @ 11:03 PM